Highlights of a weekend’s hard Fortressing:
Backstabbing Garry of Garry’s Mod a few times. Garry is seriously fucking good. I mean, like, fifty more points than anyone else in the game, whichever class he played. But he does like to play Heavy, and I haven’t met a Heavy I can’t shiv.
Breaking my all-time damage record. Soldier, first cap of the last leg of Dustbowl, on defense. Soldier’s not my preferred class, but so few people seem to understand how to suppress the masses and predict the escapees, and I really wanted to win. We did.
Someone posted a video of themselves rocking as a Soldier in this same situation, to prove that the latest update hadn’t broken the class, and in it he uses an interesting trick - a backwards rocket jump every time he gets into trouble, trying to propel himself back to health as quickly as possible. It worked well for him, not sure I’m quite there yet.
Taking out two Sentries and three men with the Spy revolver in one life. One of the more moronic suggestions touted on the official forums lately - and this is really saying something - is to increase the accuracy of the Revolver. Oh my God, learn to aim. It’s already more accurate than every other weapon in the game except the Sniper rifle, and even against that, a good Spy outsnipes a good Sniper two times out of three at anything but the most extreme range.
Telecamping the Defenders on Dustbowl. Teleporter exit on one of the raised walkways leading to the first cap on the last leg, just round the corner from the main force. Everyone ports in facing the front line. Me, dressed as a Pryo, knife ready, behind it. Endless stream of free, hopelessly unfair kills. I had to stray slightly into a Sentry’s line of sight each time I stepped forward for the kill, so my health was wearing down, but before long an enemy Medic popped back to regenerate, and kindly healed the curiously inert, injured Pyro standing behind his team’s teleporter. And a heap of bodies.
Then a nooblet Spy stormed in, on fire, sapping everything in sight and screeching for a Medic. Amazingly I survived the Spy-checks and got away, but the teleporter was down so my fun was over. I hate my team.
Squealing like a girl at a moment of surreal horror. Playing Sniper on Hydro, camping way back, alone, on some weird server. Within seconds of the round starting, there’s a weaponless enemy Pyro, standing up straight with his arms at his sides, sliding across the ground towards me without moving a muscle. I was too busy screaming to shoot it, but luckily someone else did.
