Things you should never, under any circumstances, ingest but are technically food

Haggis is fine. Lightly spiced, savoury, mince. Very similar to black pudding in taste and texture. I don’t see it as particularly adventurous.

Yeah, a lot of hay gets made of the sheep stomach part of haggis, but it’s basically just a sausage, so it’s only marginally grosser than any other sausage.

Doesn’t it use stuff like kidneys in it?
That’s what turns me off to the idea more than the stomach… I have no trouble with stomach at all.

What don’t you like about kidneys?

Sauteed kidneys and liver cooked with some spices and drowned in some fresh-squeezed lemon is just about my favorite thing to have once a year or so. Especially goat kidneys and liver. Just delicious.

However, I have had Chicken and Cow liver as well. Chicken liver is so small, it’s just one bite, and it’s over. Very unsatisfying because one chicken liver is way too small. And Cow liver is way too big. Even if you’re sharing one cow liver with several people, it’s still not easy to cook in the first place, and it’s way too heavy and fatty. At least the ones I’ve had. Goat livers and kidneys are excellent though, and they usually turn out great even at the hands of mediocre cooks like my one aunt whose recipes I usually can’t stomach.

The fact that they’re pee filters and kind of smell like pee.

I think kidneys depend on preparation. I’ve had kidney pie and it was delicious. The kidney had a good bouncy texture, similar to chicken hearts.

On the other hand, I’ve had grilled cow kidney and it was gross. Pee smell. I’m actually not sure if it is preparation, or that maybe the kidney in the pie wasn’t from a cow.

I’m a vegetarian, but I like kidney beans!

Don’t drink the water. Toxic. I know the chickpea water is making a splash with vegan circles or something.

Very true - fwiw, I’m too lazy to get uncooked beans, but I know some people who don’t and warn them of the same concern. I think it has something to do with kidney beans acting as pea filters. ~rim shot~

Is this an actual thing?
I mean, I’m assuming it’s not actually toxic, since beans aren’t toxic… but is there actually some bad thing about bean water? I found some vague reference to beans leeching some “indigestible sugars” into the water, which might make you gassy?

While most beans contain the chemical to some level, apparently kidney beans have it in a much higher concentration. From what I understand, boiling is sufficient to deactivate it; I’m unsure if there’s any particular danger in boiling the soaking water based on that.

Huh… sounds like it’s the kind of toxic that gives you stomach upset.

Not that I can really imagine wanting to eat raw beans, but whatever. Neat new thing.

From what I remember from FDA paper, you have to boil 30 (?) minutes to deactivate the toxin. Boiling for less time or lower temperature actually enhances the toxicity. Another method is throwing away the water after soaking overnight.

I did an informal poll and everyone knew you had to throw away the water, but nobody knew why (rice + beans is a staple.) In fact, when I told everyone it was toxic they all showed disbelief.

And to be clear, yes it’s not all beans.

I guess it’s a thing with undercooked kidney beans too (not just raw). Supposedly the slow cooker isn’t even enough. They need to be soaked and boiled. News to me and I’ve cooked a lot of dry beans in my day (though, I think I can count the number of times I’ve made kidney/cannellini beans on one hand).

Irrespective of that, bean broth from home cooked beans can be pretty amazing. It’s another great thing I’ll keep around from time to time to splash into other dishes at home. Adds starch, salt and whatever other concentrated flavors were with the beans when cooking.

Oh yeah, so this stuff has gained the stupid moniker aquafaba, but it’s apparently a great substitute for egg whites. Get the drained off syrupy water from some canned chickpeas and you can even make a decent meringue, I’ve heard!

UK bakery chain Greggs has a novel take on transubstantiation:

What the hell …

I mean, I’d try that out, but that is pretty crazy.

So would I. Except for the creamed corn and the green bean casserole.

I need to replicate some of these flavors into popcorn toppings.