Things you should never, under any circumstances, ingest but are technically food


Apparently, Twinkies originally had banana cream in them, until WWII,and when they removed the banana due to rationing and general availability. Ive toyes with the idea of making homemade original style banana flavored twinkies, since I can only imagine theyd be a lot better than the current packaged version.

The rebooted Hostess did limited edition banana cream flavored version, but I’m assuming the actual cake and creme quality is lower now than back in the day.

Whenever I think about changes in packaged foods, I always think about Chef Boayardee, which started with a real Italian chef named Boiardi who made take-and-boil dinners with a jar of sauce and dried noodles. Im assuming he wasn’t selling Beefaroni, but supposedly he did approve the early canned products as well. I always wonder how close the canned versions could have been to actual food, or if the standards for canned foods were just lower such that “tastes kind of like pasta” was enough of a triumph as to be considered acceptable.


I used to enjoy Progresso soups. Then at some point in the 1990s maybe earlier, they started to put a ton of corn syrup in them. Disgustingly sweet. I sent them an actual letter complaining, no reply. Never bought it again.


Campbell’s chunky used to be decent, then one day they became terrible.

Progresso is better these days, but they’re still mostly meh.




You’re not wrong.

At least things cost more and you get less of it.



Companies just trying to trim our waistlines, they are so thoughtful. You thought you were just buying a can of soup, you’re buying into holistic health!


Was never a big fan of Little Debbie except for one item - those strawberry and coconut things they had. I thought those were better than even Ding Dongs and Ho-Hos. Haven’t had one in probably 20 years, but they were my go-to snack for the longest time.


The oatmeal cookies were decent.


Read that as “unicorns” instead of “unions” and was like wtf?


I used to enjoy Nutty Bars. Nowadays, I think the sugar concentration is just too high. They’re basically instant heartburn in a wrapper. That’s just age talking though, it’s the same with any candy bar of significant size.


I almost put this on Facebook, except… well Social Media is probably not why this exists. This almost feels like it has the same place and prespread peanut butter.

Also Mayochup, like the word, sounds awful. I don’t even want to say it even though I eat maychup all the time since I put mayo and ketchup on a number of things, together.


Just go Puerto Rican and call it mayoketchup! Watch the video for pronunciation my typing cannot do justice :)



I guess people might buy it. Seems like a dumb product to me, due to limited utility, but dijonnaise is fairly successful, I believe, so some people may like the convenience.

Edit: oh, it’s all Heinz? Probably a ploy to drill into Hellman’s market share.


It’s basically Marie Rose sauce. I don’t like it, but as a thing it long predates social media.


And for our American readers - toss in a bit of pickle relish and you have thousand island dressing.
Or a bit of Worcestershire garlic and pepper and you have Raising Cane’s sauce (based on my travels this summer, Cane’s must be the fastest-growing chain in the US, so if you don’t know about them now, you probably will soon).

As for Mayochup - whatever business school taught marketing to those guys should give them their money back.


That’s just a gross sounding word right? There is nothing about ketchup and mayonnaise combined that disturbs me, but I can’t get past looking at or even saying the name.



It will never by mustmayostardayonnaise


Ketchup and mayo is just fry sauce, which is fantastic stuff.