The Jumper thread got me thinking. Most of us can agree when certain movies are bad. But some of us have weird little jumped synapses or maybe a skewed predilection that makes us actually like certain movies even though – or perhaps because – they’re bad. I’m not talking about movies where you could make a case they’re not actually as bad as some folks think. I don’t mean the Armageddons or the Charlies’ Angels or the Constantines or the Shoot 'Em Ups. I mean out-and-out bad movies that you nevertheless love. And no fair bringing up MST3k fodder, as that’s a whole other ball of wax.
For instance, partly because I saw it when I was a kid, I really like The Car. It’s a rip-off of Jaws, plot point for plot point, but with a driverless demonic car instead of a shark. So 70s, so wooden, so bad. But so awesomely bad it’s good. And I love the actual car.
But I have to say the worst bad movie I love is Chupacabra Terror. From the Navy Seals to John Rhys Davies to Giancarlo Esposito’s Captain Ahab of indeterminate accent to the bit parts (gotta love the sleezy con artist’s hearty community theatre overperformance!) to the production design, which is based almost entirely on hanging a single orange life preserver on the wall to suggest a cruise ship. And you simply cannot beat the climactic scene in which the chupacabra is kickboxed by the lovely Chelan Simmons (who was suntanned to death in Final Destination 3!).
I am the proud owner of both movies, and I heartily recommend them to you all. That’s right, you heard me: I recommend them! And, yeah, they’re bad.