This week's Onion

This “Operation Piss Off the Planet” issue is the best since The Onion tackled 9-11. Some pretty pointed stuff, too. Like…

U.S. Continues Proud Tradition Of
Diversity On Front Lines
CAMP COYOTE, KUWAIT—With blacks and Hispanics comprising more than 60 percent of the Army’s ground forces in Iraq, the U.S. military is continuing its long, proud tradition of multiculturalism on the front lines of war. “Though racism and discrimination remain problems in society at large, in the military—especially in the lower ranks where you find the cannon fodder—a spirit of inclusiveness has prevailed for decades,” Gen. Jim White said Monday. “When it comes to having your head blown off by enemy fire, America is truly colorblind.”

Hah, the Onion is finally wrong for once. There’s actually a disproportionate number of caucasians in combat roles; for some reason blacks and hispanics tend to end up in support roles.

This one’s hilarious!

"“I watch Al-Jazeera on satellite but turn the sound off and listen to NPR. I have no idea what the fuck is happening.”

Gordon Jackson


Here’s an article from USA Today about the slightly disproportionate number of whites in combat roles. At one point, it’s suggested that this lack of blacks may be due to subtle racism. Our armed forces just can’t win. Except on the battlefield, obviously.

I’ll anectdotally support that. I was in an infantry battalion back in the day as an assistant S-2, and we were mostly a bunch of palefaces except for the maintenance comapany.