So I was looking at my boots just now, these fairly clunky, black, steel toe-capped numbers from Skechers, and I was thinking that, if I ever took it upon myself to dress up as a Dark Lord of the Sith for a costume party or something - or maybe just to amuse myself on a long, dark winter’s night - that these would probably be some pretty good boots.
But then, as I re-tied one of the laces, it occured to me that wearing lace-up boots would probably be a pretty bad idea as the idea of a Sith Lord tying his own bootlaces in the morning is just comically absurd.
But then I thought that, were a Dark Jedi to wear lace-up boots, he probably wouldn’t tie them by hand. He’d probably just use the Force to do it. And then it occured to me that this would most likely be a Force Power reserved only for the highest master Jedi, as the amount of focus required to pull it off would be awesome. Using the Force to throw rocks around and collapse windpipes is one thing, but to achieve that level of intricate mental dexterity, surely Force bootlace-tying would be the ultimate Jedi feat.
But then I realized that Force Lace-Tying would probably not be a Dark Side Power as it’s too benign. This somewhat scuppered my original premise and thus was my train of thought derailed.
Ah, but manipulating ropes with the force could be used for offensive purposes. Perchance dark Jedis practice with their shoelaces, so that when it comes time to trip or strangle an unsuspecting servent of the light, they will be ready.
Or they could use the power to surrepticiously tie someone else’s shoelaces together.
Okay, I’m ready to accept that Force Laces could at the very least be a neutral power. Like the Force itself, it can be bent to either the light or the darkness, depending on how you wish to use it.
PS I challenge anybody to post a link which points to where this subject was covered in a previous thread.
Dare I ask what the non-comical way for a Sith Lord to go to the toilet is?[/quote]
I can’t imagine there would be much of a way around this, unless Jedis have developed such total control over their bodies that they no longer need to excrete. More likely they still do, but they probably use some kind of Force Levitate to ease the stool from their ass and into the water so it touches down nice and gently and they don’t get any splashback.
I always wondered in Star Trek why they ever walked to the bathroom. “Scotty, I have to take a dump. Please beam it directly from my colon to Dr. McCoy’s pillowcase.”
Well since you never see a toilet on Star Trek (apart from Voyager, where the entire show was in the shitter), I imagine that’s exactly what they do. The “toilets” of the 23rd/24th Century are probably just miniature transporters that detect when you need to take a dump and then just beam the fecal matter directly out of your colon and into whatever waste system they have on board ship. Or just dematerialize it althogether, although I don’t know if transporters can do that. I guess they can just zap it out into outer space – when you consider the size of space, the odds against a stray floating turd landing on someone else’s space-windshield have got to be QUITE LITERALLY astronomical.
Personally, however, I really enjoy sitting on the toilet and taking a shit, so I don’t really see how the future would be any better for the advent of this particular technology. Yet another example of technology that doesn’t actually improve the quality of our lives sigh
If there were enough laces and it was a long enough process, the Sith could cultivate his frustration at the waste of time into hatred for it, giving him the power to “force-lace.”
Yeah, because I want the transporter beaming things out of the lower part of my body.
“Well sir, on the upside, you don’t have to worry about birth control anymore…”[/quote]
Does that mean you wouldn’t go through a transporter at all? If you’re willing to have your entire body scrambled and re-assembled on a molecular level, what’s the harm in the occasional turd-beaming?
Hell no I’m not going through a transporter. Don’t you know how many accidents those things cause?[/quote]
“On the whole, transporters are one of the safest ways to travel in the 24th century.”
There are those, however, like Dr. Leonard McCoy or Lieutenant Reginald Barclay, who would argue that having your every molecule scrambled, turned back into energy, and then put back in the right order, often thousands of kilometers away, can never be entirely safe.
I think I’ll trust Admiral McCoy over “conventional wisdom” anyday.
There are those, however, like Dr. Leonard McCoy or Lieutenant Reginald Barclay, who would argue that having your every molecule scrambled, turned back into energy, and then put back in the right order, often thousands of kilometers away, can never be entirely safe.
I think I’ll trust Admiral McCoy over “conventional wisdom” anyday.[/quote]
McCoy never made Admiral, did he?
