Ultimate final Star Wars lightsaber battle poll

Been watching Revenge of the Sith on DVD and it’s inspired me to post this, what will hopefully be the final poll on the subject…

(Some of the lesser battles not included because of poll option limits)

Obi-Wan vs. that dude’s arm in Mos Eisley.

The Maul fight is still the best. Too bad it’s in an all-around shitty film. I wish someone would make a multi-DVD player that let me select the good scenes from all three films and skip over all that Jar-Jar Binks slapstick and “I love you like sand” tripe.

I’d argue that the Maul fight is the only good duel in all 6 movies. The original trilogy’s duels did have kind of a zen appeal, though.

The Maul fight would win, but I cannot vote for it in good conscience because, a) Fuck Star Wars, and b) they kept cutting away from it to happy shiny battle droids rogerrogering against the army of jarjars catapulting glowy explodey beachballs at them. I mean, Jesus. It’s like someone’s serving you a generally good steak, but insists that every other bite be some sort of boiled tofu with eggshell sprinkles on it.

Mind you, the Episode V fight was retroactively ruined by Luke’s one shining moment of nobility in his silent dive off the platform being turned into his girly wilhelm shriek, but the Special shortbus editions are at least easier to ignore.

What Drastic said.

Despite the somewhat sedate nature of it compared to recent fighty stuff, I’m sticking with the original/remastered Cloud City duel (minus girly scream at the end).

His name is Ponda Baba and he is my favorite.

He doesn’t like you.

Didn’t they take the scream back out again in the new super-duper DVD edition?

Dunno. If they did, it retroactively partially unruins the retroactive ruining of my vote.

I did hear the latest super editions makes Greedo’s laser leave the barrel at only a ten degree angle instead of a forty-five degree angle–I’m not actually sure that’s a good re-edit. Once you start with blaster bolts leaving the barrels at angles other than zero, you should really make every shot in the movies work that way. Imagine Han in Cloud City suddenly realizing Lando screwed them all, and while the others are all standing around pulling a stupid face, he could whip the blaster out of his holster, spin to point the blaster at the doorjam, sending a perfectly-aimed ninety-degree bolt off for Vader to catch. Or, he could fire directly at him still, but Vader could be CG’ed diving to the side to catch the off-angled bolt like a Force-powered goalie dive.

(tiredly…) Fuck Star Wars - already. Really. Enough. RIP…

I voted for the Q+O+DM duel in ep. I too, but damn, only one vote for Obi-Wan vs Anakin/Vader? You can Fuck Star Wars all you want, but that fight totally did not suck. Nostalgia be damned, it kicked any fight from the OT in the junk.

They added a scream when Luke drops off the platform?

I have no idea how that douchebag Darth Maul managed to get so high up in the rankings of supposedly civilized human beings.

Yeah it was great, until it turned into a platform game.

Given the intercut nature of all these fights, Fuck Star Wars. You can’t pick Maul without also picking the stupid droid fight over the battles on Endor and the Death Star II.

I picked the Return of the Jedi one because of “Sssister” and that awesome choral music. Which probably got replaced with steel drums in the new versions, but I don’t count the stupid changes against the original.

His name is Ponda Baba and he is my favorite.

He doesn’t like you.[/quote]

Are his further adventures chronicled in some form of Novel, comic book, and/or fanfic?

I went with Return of the Jedi as well.

His name is Ponda Baba and he is my favorite.

He doesn’t like you.[/quote]

Are his further adventures chronicled in some form of Novel, comic book, and/or fanfic?[/quote]

Not knowing anything at all about this character I’d say that the answer to your question is still, without a doubt, a resounding yes.

…and it wasn’t the Wilhelm scream, was it? cringe

  • Alan

The new series fights reminded me too much of shit like the Bourne Supremacy, where the fight kind of looks cool, but then you realize you’re really watching a bunch of camera cuts and confused action.

I prefer the fights in the original series because I could actually follow them. I’m not a big fan of the Darth Maul fight because instead of thinking, “Wicked, gnarly martial artist guy is kicking ass,” I’m thinking, “Wait, what the hell was that flash, what the hell did he just throw against that switch, hold on, how did that guy just get knocked backward 10 feet, why’s Rob Roy on some different platform, what happened to Trainspotter’s lightsaber, AGGGHHHHH!”

Get off my lawn.