Where are you based? I do recommend going to your local pub that has local brews and seeing what milk stouts/coffee porters are available. That’s how I found out about the one I mentioned above.
Alex.
You want a beer without hops or malt?
‘Sweet’ beers include Scotch Ale (= Wee Heavy, a much better name). The classic imports like Belhaven or American versions like Great Divide’s Claymore.
The other main sweet style that comes to mind are the classic German darks - Maibocks, Dopplebocks. Rouge Dead Guy Ale, Celebrator, Spaten Optimator, etc.
But all those might be too malty for you.
I don’t mind malt so much as I do ones where they’ve roasted it black. I don’t much care for “burnt food” (yes, I realize there’s a world of difference here, but work with me, k?) and the faint bitterness that imparts. So the golden, partially roasted ingredients in the beer that Chappers mentioned intrigued me a great deal, since my least favorite aspect of most milk stouts I’ve had is the deep roasted/coffee/dark chocolate notes they possess.
P.S. - It’s worth noting that I genuinely hate beer and everything that makes beer, well, beer, so I may well be striving for the impossible here.
I remember trying to get a dopplebock because a similar discussion elsewhere ended up on them, but the only thing I could find locally was Shiner, and then I gave up before moving to the much more microbrew-friendly area I live now.
@ArmandoPenblade, let me be your guide.
So here are some of my personal favorites. Because while I do occasionally enjoy an IPA or other bitter beer, they aren’t my favorites. Good, and a frequent drink, but not my number one.
So here are a few I recommend.
Arcadia Ales has some fantastic beers, but my favorite of theirs is the Nut Brown Ale
Kostrlitzer is a German schwarzbier, and it is fantastic.
Hofbrauhaus Dunkel is of a similar type, and is generally easily available. It’s like if Kostrlitzer is 10/10 for me, the Dunkel is a solid 8.5.
If you want something on the fruitier/ sweeter side, Leinenkugels I generally like. It may not be something you can get, as it is a northern Wisconsin brewery.
You should be able to find the German imports most anywhere. We drank tons of that stuff in college, way back when the only US beer worth the name ‘beer’ was Anchor Steam.
Leinenkugels is probably national? They are trying really hard to make ‘shandy’ the next trendy thing. Basically beer mixed literally with fruit juice. The wine cooler of the beer world.
I look forward to going to my birthday party tonight with a written list in hand. Hmm. I wonder if I can check their beer list ahead of time.
Actually, if I can trouble you helpful beer-devotees like @CraigM, @gruntled, and @Chappers just a moment longer, do you all see anything on draft or bottle here that might fit the bill (I didn’t see much from what you all have listed so far aside from the general stouts in the Malt section, though I am only glancing swiftly):
http://www.busybeeraleigh.com/draft-beer/
http://www.busybeeraleigh.com/bottled-beer/
Which was really popular in Germany, by the way. My wife, who hates beer, was enjoying the local German kinderbier which had things like strawberry I think? Bit fuzzy on that at the moment.
Yikes, Armando. I haven’t heard of most of those!
So, umm, generally I’m going to steer you away from anything Session, Pils (personal preference, but I bet you’d hate them) or pilsner, and anything stout
However maybe try a Belgian or wheat ale. Those tend to be less bitter, and have good flavors but lighter flavors. Often a sweet, fruity, or nutty flavor. They have a Kreik beer on menu, the Cascade Kreik. You might like that one.
Yeah. In fairness, a joint like Flying Saucer has a much larger selection (where you’d be able to find more stuff to rec me), but since, you know, it’s all about beer first and food after, whereas Busy Bee has the best goddamned tater tots in the state, and it’s my party, I’m opting for BB :)
Nonetheless, thanks for the advice!
Roasted malts are a taste that some just don’t enjoy. It does grow on you though. I agree with the others recommending you toward a malty but less bitter beer. It’s not the hops that really put all the bitterness in a big stout like that, it’s the roasted malts too. As my girlfriend says, “every stout tastes like coffee!” Well, okay, to her maybe. But when I ask her to describe why she says the same thing, roasted to the point it is too bitter for her.
While they used to be one in the same, the styles of porter and stout now might be a good way for you to differentiate. Between a light blonde ale and a dark stout, there are various gradients of malts for coloring, but there are also malts added for more flavor. Look for descriptive terms for the beer like; toasty, biscuity, malty, sweet, caramel, bread, and even toffee. You might want to ease into the darker malts. Brown ales and ambers versus midnight black stouts or maybe even a lighter porter. And try to keep them sweeter like milk and oatmeal stouts.
Also be wary of the term chocolate, it’s not just a flavoring, it’s a descriptive term for a specific malt that has been pretty well toasted. So these may end up bitter for you if it is referring to the latter.
I’d recommend some English style stouts, porters, and brown ales, or American versions brewed in the same style.
Beer drinking is a journey and what you don’t like today may be something you love in six months. I’d recommend getting a variety of darker beers. Have one per evening on nights when you have a little time to reflect on them. Take them out of the fridge and let em warm up a bit. Somewhere between room temp and fridge temp. Pop them open and use a glass that helps you smell them better, something like this. And when you drink them, try to place the flavors a bit more than when you go out for a beer evening. Even if you don’t think you’ll like one, try to sample some in the extreme ends of the range you do like.
My local grocer has it for $10.99 I think. I think Ballast Point is the most expensive beer I buy, or Dogfish Head. They both can go up to $13.99.
That’s expensive?
Not really, I know Stone has some $17-18 six packs, I think Ballast Point does as well. But I know I can get a good beer on sale for $7-8 a sixer.
I see you actually quoted someone else not me. I responded to that.
@Skipper, wanted to thank you as well for the great advice.
To be fair, I’ve tried beer a lot of times. From fumbling youthful forays toward Pabst and Budweiser to trying out “funky” beers like Magic Hat to trying my first stouts (I still kinda almost sorta like Duck Rabbit and Left Hand’s Milk Stouts right up until I don’t, usually about 1/3 of the way through a pint), to sampling some of the weirder local brews and stuff (e.g., that goofy-ass Sweet Baby Jesus beer).
Because, well, I love food. I really, really do. I’ve expanded my culinary horizons so much over the years, alcohol and beer seem like a logical evolution. . .
… . but goddamn if I don’t hate bitter tastes. :)
I hear ya man. Not but 5 years ago, I hated beer. My “venture” into beer was to determine I could drink about 3/4 of a Miller versus 1/2 of a Bud. But I had a very determined craft brew loving friend who also homebrews beer. And he was very, very patient with me. “Try this and tell me what it tastes like,” was his method of teaching.
My first IPA I spit on the sidewalk (please forgive me Two Hearted Ale.) My first stout, however, was pretty awesome. I thought every stout tasted like Guinness, which to me tastes vaguely bitter and kind of watery.
Try to think of the bitter tastes for what they are, not what they aren’t. You would rarely describe brussel sprouts or arugula as, “nothing but bitter flavor in a dish.” They have their own tastes as well, and when highlighted, taste pretty damned good. The same is true with hops and roasted malts. A hop bomb to me can taste like grapefruit and mango heaven. A huge stout can taste like a deep, chocolatey, and rich flavor bomb that doesn’t even compare to what I would think of as a beer, more like an awesome dessert.
For you, beer pairing would be a wonderful thing to do. Cooking with beer as well. Take one of those stouts you think is way too bitter, and use it for an alcohol splash in a pan sauce after searing some steaks in a skillet. Fucking amazing.
Give it time. Don’t think of it as a means to get shit faced. There are a ton of tastes out there right now, beer is in its heyday.
Speaking of expensive beers, dogfish head 120 IPA is ~ $10-12 per 12oz bottle. It’s damn good, though!
I would stick with the malts on that list, I really don’t know many of them. I quite like Brooklyn lager, it has quite a defined taste, almost like an English Ale. I suggest that you ask to try the beer on tap to see what you like. Most bars let you sample the drafts. It’s a good way of figuring it at least what style of beer you like.
Yikes! Nowhere near that price where I live… (I like the 90-minute better than either the 60- or 12- anyway)
Question: Do you guys feel like you drink less, when you get really expensive beers like that? I’ve always wondered that.