I mean i live in Texas and have these conversations all the time, and they efficiently boil down to a couple of principles, which is negative politics, information capture, and one issue voting.
The GOP has learned this lesson well. I mean, for the first time in years - decades - i’m seeing GOP ads in Texas. Literally, the ads being run by Cornyn are 1) dems coming for your guns and 2) dems coming for your health care (which, at this point, is basically like an echo issue that no longer makes sense).
The reason i say that disenchanted conservatives need to clean their own house is because of those one issue voters that will never actually agree to vote democratic, under any circumstance, unless, more or less, democrats agree to cede the one issue they are hung up on.
The alternative is this mythical “swing voter” but it’s clear that swing voters - actual swing voters - are swing voters because they’re ideologically unclear and probably informationally challenged. In effect they represent a slice of the electorate that is more susceptible to personality and mood swings of the times, have no problems holding inconsistent positions. If it’s these swing voters that we need to discuss, how best to tailor Democratic policies and actions for them, that’s, imo, a somewhat different conversation, and is as much or more about perception than substance.
But conservative, true conservative voters, one issue voters, aren’t going to switch parties for any reason, because they’ve been ideologically captured by the right. A conservative that hates all gun control isn’t going to compromise with any amount of gun control. To even gain the opportunity to serve him politically the Democratic establishment would have to declare their support to end all gun regulations. Likewise with abortion, likewise with climate change and environmental regulations.
And a party that as its national platform has declared itself to reject climate change, gun control, and abortion already exists… it’s just not the Democratic Party. To meet in the middle means being willing to compromise - nay, really, it means to cede - to conservative demands on those three policy positions above. And, tbh, that list once it became part of the dialog would just grow. Pretty quickly conservatives would learn of their sudden influence, and add more exclusions to the pile, like raising taxes for any reason.
That’s why i tell conservatives that they need to vote against their party not for policy position but because of corruption and the rule of law. Because a voter that votes to abolish gun regulations in the face of clear violations of the rule of law really does care less about the rule of law than guns.
All this goes against (imo) your thesis that passing popular legislation is what needs to be done - because all these one issue voters will never vote for the other party, no matter how popular that legislation was or unpopular their own party is. What you’re really asking, imo, is how to break the stranglehold on American politics these binary trumped-up issues have on our collective ability to act.