What induces nerd rage in you?

What annoys you, but also makes you think “Wow, it is so pathetic that this bothers me so much.”

Me? “Cyclons”.

People who refer to their PC as “the hard drive”. It’s not just a hard drive! There’s a freakin’ motherboard with a freakin’ CPU and freakin’ RAM in there too!!!

Okay. I’m calmer now.

What doesn’t?

People who put “the” in front of technological things, as if it’s somehow unique.

“I found it on the Google.”

People who don’t eat certain kinds of food and who have to point it out whenever you are eating any of such food. As though you’ll suddenly grip them by the back of the head and force them to eat a spoonful. I really don’t need to know that something I’m eating makes you gag, or you threw-up once when you ate it. Seriously…

pathetic things that drive me insane? Not that many, actually, but the one that does is WAY pathetic:

people that misread the rules and believe it’s possible to slide their regiments around while charging in Warhammer.


People who 1) set their TVs to stretch 4:3 content to 16:9 AND 2) sneer at others’ explanations of why this is wrong, because BIGGER is BETTER in any ratio.

H emmer effing R. I just had to forward my job description to my HR department. Maybe that’s more general rage than nerd rage, but I lump it together because they should freaking know this stuff already.

And in my part of the country they call it “the CPU” instead of “the hard drive.”

Any person who ever buys a pre-packaged system at a higher price than it would have cost than rolling their own, despite the fact that I have advertised very clearly on several occasions the fact that I would be happy to show everybody how to build a goddamn computer out of parts. Maybe in the lunchroom so that everybody can see.

When television shows get technology so wrong that it learns to sleep with its back to the wall out of habit.

When people fail to use classification systems properly. Like, take an online dating site from the thread just over ----> that a way. OkCupid, if you believe it, is full of bisexuals. That’s great, except all of them are looking to date women exclusively. So, I’m forced to ask, why in the donkey launching gorilla fuck did you label yourself bisexual? Did you think that anybody was going to draw some deep and fundamental conclusion about how you classify yourself as an individual and your personal sexual identity based on the field in a form? No. No they weren’t. You’re just absolutely goddamn fucking up the system for people who are trying to use it by inserting yourself into search results that you want to be excluded from. Read between the lines you drooling idiot - the field is for sorting people who want to have sex with what kind of people they want to have sex with. If you don’t want to have sex with guys right now, whether because you already have one or because you’re just not into that at the moment, call yourself a lesbian.

People who take out problem tickets with me to report problems where if they had just bothered to put the text of their error message into the fucking Google search box and hit the button, the cause of their problem would have become flagrantly obvious. I know that you might be too dumb to figure out how to configure your internet proxy settings, but I’d like to think that you can work a box and a button.

Every single IE/FireFox toolbar ever created and their pigheaded insistence on pop-up blocking, and, furthermore, the general ignorance of the plebeian masses to the fact that ALL OF THEM DO THAT. You know how many times a month I get some dumbass client complaining about the report not loading in its pop-up box and he’s got goddamn Yahoo! toolbar or some other pile of ridiculous crap running right there?

People who think that it’s a good idea to develop “macros” for Microsoft Office. Seriously. That stupid tool you make today to copy all of your data to some third worksheet where it will then be molested thoroughly and handed off to the final book for publication will one day be my problem, and you know what? You suck at doing code. That’s why nobody wants to pay you to do it. So stop.

Flash websites. I have buttons on my browser for a goddamn reason you shit eating ass crackers. Let me lend you some clues - your web designer is a hack. It is not cool that I have to use your in-browser menu to navigate from your blog to your photos to your bio just to tell if you’re Screaming Idiot #12 from Large-Scale Hollywood Action Movie, and it is even more not cool that when I go and hit the back button like I have been trained to do by ten years of having access to the internet that I am then booted directly back to your entry splash page - or even better, the Google search results.

Web designers in general, for that matter, kind of piss me off, if only because they seem to have given up their craft in the name of looking like Twitter. Somebody recently booted me in the ass until I finally created a Facebook account and as far as I can tell, it’s the same goddamn thing, which makes it doubly baffling to me. And OkCupid is doing that now too.

Which reminds me - social networks. What the hell? Why do I have a Facebook account? From what I can tell, all it’s good for is playing games that are, for the most part, better replicated with their own standalone applications and looking at other people’s pictures like some kind of pervy stalker, which I could do just as well from the bushes by their bedroom windows. You’ve got your LinkedIn for business and your MySpace for musicians for some reason and your Facebook for your “real” friends and why the hell do I have them? They’re like email addresses except you have to be on the network to send anything to anybody. So congratulations, retards - you just sponsored what amounts to proprietary HotMail. Not that I’m any better, because I’ve got one too, but at least I’m doing my damnedest not to do anything with it.

pant pant Okay. Okay. I think I’m out for now, mostly because I have to beat my brother home to give him a blood meter to see if he’s got a wonderful chronic disease. There’s totally more, though. I suspect I may have drifted from the nerd theme at some point, though.

yeah, that is annoying, but i don’t think its nerd rage. nerd rage is what you see in WOW players when someone disses their game. nerd rage is me getting upset while discussing how the Star Trek prime directive relates to current 3rd world intervention.

Nope, those are all totally valid things to be annoyed with.

I am annoyed by “lawl”.

Nerd Rage.

So many things, sooooo many things…

TV ads, hypocritical language in press releases, any sort of ad campaign aimed at <SNEER QUOTE OPEN>gamers<SNEER QUOTE CLOSE>.

Also, anything George Carlin used to get mad at.

a lot of what you guys are posting sure is annoying, but it isn’t necessarily nerd rage.

Term used to describe extreme anger, offence, indignation, and other similar emotions by a nerd, geek or similar. Nerd Rage can be triggered by a number of things, most commonly through helplessness in the face of bullying, internet fights, or seeing their favorite film/show/anime/etc degraded or insulted in some way.

now lets get serious

-That there is such a thing as “The Committee for Workplace Enthusiasm”. That someone thought it up, and subsequently decided it was a fine idea. That people are on this committee. That I have gotten emails from them.

-Poor use of the english language in any sort of professional capacity. For example: in pamphlets, anything on company letterhead, television commercials, news broadcasts, mass emails, presentations, etc. I got all uppity about this one earlier today:

With the hustle and bustle of today’s face-paced living, who couldn’t use a little stress relief?!
Everybody is stressed-out, but few people have the tools they need to adequately address the effects these stresses have on their body. And stress has many detrimental effects, including sleep disturbances, increased irritability, loss of concentration, focus and memory, and lost productivity. Once more, the negative impacts of stress have been linked to high blood pressure, weight gain, anxiety, fatigue and numerous other diseases.

To the great surprise of nobody, the expression “digital download” irritates the piss out of me.


Greedo shooting first.

Comic Sans.

Employees at my company who think that because it’s my job to fix their work computer, it’s also my job to fix their home computer.

Employees at my company who think that because it’s my job to fix their work computer, it’s also my job to fix their kid’s Xbox.

Nothing pisses me off more than an employee at my work replying to all instead just replying. Stop filling up my inbox with your worthless questions you fucks.

Any utterance from the wife regarding my videogaming. Stone SOup the other night was called “That game with the city you have been playing”. What? Aside from the fact that her description is completely inaccurate, do you even look at the screen? The fact that every videogame is, “The one where you are slaying dragons”. The fact that she thinks Reality TV has some beneficial quality to it that in anyway trumps gaming in any form.

Mine may be better classified as Marital Rage.

It really annoys me when people use the word meme as some kind of descriptor. like “meme art”… all art is composed of memes. “internet memes” aren’t as much of an abuse to language as the first example, but in that case whoever uses that term is just too lazy to actually describe what it really is, like maybe it’s just a saying, or a joke.

The other thing that annoys me is misuse of the word evolution.

You know what’s worse than average dumbfucks referring to the computer as “the CPU”? Programmers referring to the fucking computer as “the CPU”. Yeah, we’ve got one over at some developer forum.

I also have immense hatred for people who are too lazy to get their own domain for e-mail. THAT is true nerd rage!