Just got a last-minute call from an editor, so I thought I’d hit up the brain trust on this one, because I have to turn in a list of 20+ things by week-end.
If you wanted the ultimate game room, money was no object, but you wanted to stick to primarily things people could buy as opposed to things like a statue of yourself in solid gold, what would those things be?
And if ‘game room’ is throwing you off like it did me, think ‘the most badass basement/den you always wish you had.’ Things like air hockey tables, full-sized arcade machines (I’m thinking some sort of licensed multi-game cabinet, if such a thing exists besides that half-sized Target one), that sort of stuff.
Stuff that I’d want:
Electronic dart board
Some sort of arcade cabinet, preferrably with a selection of games
Selection of past and present consoles
Tivo or Tivo-like computer
Comfy couch for TV
Stuff that should probably be listed:
Ping pong table
Air hockey table
a big poker table.
two big screen tv’s. (For games and the game.)
the right carpet, not to shaggy, not to rough.
a large L- shaped Couch.
good floor seating.
a device to select which machine is using the AV input that actually works.
But really I’d have to go with a good quality air hockey table, a MAME cabinet with thousands of games in it, and at least two pinball tables (Arabian Nights and The Twilight Zone for me). A well-stocked bar is a must. Card table with full poker night trimmings. HDTV setup with seating for ten or so. Small fridge. And shelves. My God, the shelves.
Arcade games: Smash TV (2 player), Aliens vs Predator (3 player), Tron, Discs of Tron (full environmental), Elevator Action, APB, Paperboy, Shadow Dancer, and an ultra-remix edition of DDR (2 units side-by-side in a 2 player setup). Each would have an additional CRT mounted on top of the cabinet giving a view of the game screen to an audience (no crowding the controls, please!)
Pinball machines: Terminator 2, Addams Family, Earthquake, Jurassic Park, Bride of Pinbot.
8 PCs (with all the goodies) setup as a LAN over a switched Gigabit network. Headphones with good noise-cancelling mics on each.
4 TVs/XBoxes in front of a nice big sectional couch, probably setup into a V-shape with two setups on each leg of the V. Same headphones rigged up if possible.
Full size air hockey table. Full size pool table. Soda fountain with 8 different drinks. An old school looking jukebox which plays actual CDs in addition to MP3s. Dedicated restroom.
Urinals? How about a suction catheter that fits snugly over the head of your penis and is a stunning recreation of Jennifer Love Hewitt’s face and mouth as designed by Stan Winston’s Studios (because you dig her sort of, but really you’d probably be more satisfied just peeing in her mouth instead, you know? Maybe I’m way off base here), and a chair with a slide-away seat opening into a shitter like an airplane’s commode. One armrest has an over/under Mt. Dew soda can dispenser (ice cold, nothing beats a Dewski from a can, man) and Doritos chip dispenser (which switches flavors randomly after 15 chips from a personalized pre-programmed list). The other armrest houses an all-in-one master remote and an Astroglide spigot - for, erm, lubricating the chair parts and keeping the leather supple, don’t cha know. Oh, and a headrest that can support your neck and head from lolling backwards or side to side when you’re working the grind in your fave RPG/MMOG and it’s, well, almost 3AM or whatever.