Why am I loser without my wife?

Hey, that’s me, when she whines about how much time I spend at the computer I tend to have these thoughts about how much better everything would be had I remained a bachelor, I can cook fine and iron a shirt to military spec, no problem.
But every time she’s away for more than a day I revert into a state of savagery. Unshaved, unwashed, skipping meals and living on microwaved frankfurt sausages and beer, wandering bored around dark rooms at noon because I can’t get arsed to open the blinds and I’m sick of playing whatever I’ve been playing for 16 hours straight. If she ever has to be a couple of weeks away i’ll have to go to my mom’s place or i’ll be found dead or insane.

It’s not one of those deals where you are so overwhelmed by the freedom that you end up thinking so much about how to use the time and make it the perfect experience that you end up not really doing much of anything, is it?

I do that. It’s not pretty.


It’s time to get a life, dude.

Did I already start a thread about this? Hmmm…I may have, now that you mention it…the last time she went out of town. Guess I am more lost than I thought!

But she’s back now. It was only a couple of days. I’ll have to take Bob up on the BBQ/beerfest another time, since I didn’t get the message until it was too late.

Actually, that’s a large part of it. Whenever I have nothing to do and total freedom, I tend to freeze up and miss out on all the potential fun I could be having.

Not to be an ass, but I was in the same situation until I read this thread. My wife and son have been gone a week, coming back the end of the month. I was kind of at a loss until I read Robert’s post…it really lit a fire under me.

Now I’ve knocked off four household projects that have been sitting around forever, cooked a dinner for friends, and have a list for the rest of the week.

Thanks, Robert! :)

Yay Mike :)

Wow. P-whipping by proxy. Awesome! (I kid).

I had a freelance project this past weekend that was going to keep me out of the house for some long hours. My wife decided she was too stir crazy, taking care of our 3 month old baby 24/7, and if I wasn’t going to be around this weekend, she was going to visit a family friend out of state. She took the baby, and is gone until Wednesday.

Holy shit, the 1st quiet time I’ve had in about 5 months. I miss them both, but I’m relishing the free time. I’ve been finishing up CoD2 and skirmishing in Dawn of War, with the speakers up loud. I barely remembered I had speakers after years of earphones only. It’s been great, but I think I want them to come home already. :(

Man, we’re a sad bunch

… but in a good way.

Hello, me. Like, exactly me. Throw in smoking some fine Virginia tobacco from a pipe after the grilling, and that’s me. Maybe I’d either read some Panzer Leader or read a comic book.

Also, I used to be a really fantastic cook. The problem is, my wife is a vegetarian. So I can’t really cook much for her, as all my good dishes are meat dishes. When left to fend for myself, I now tend to eat things like a flour tortilla shell (cold) with some hot sauce poured into the middle.


  • You are a loser with your wife too, and that just happens to be her fetish.

  • You have become horribly dependent on her, with your entire personality wrapped up around her very existence, living only for an approving smile, a nod, a kiss, a kind word. This post is simply a desperate cry for help, one that is akin to throwing mustard seed on fallow ground. If you want someone to buck you up on the masculine side, try walking into a biker bar, in the middle of a close football game, at the height of happy hour and turn off the TV, ask for their attention, explain the situation and say you’d appreciate their thoughts on the matter. Come dressed in sweater vest.

  • You’re a good guy and you sweetly miss your wife and in missing her you’ve forgotten some of the pros of single life. Invite some friends over for poker night (or whatever floats your boat).

You don’t have kids do you Robert? If you did you’d be packing every ounce of wife&kid-less free time into gaming, eating bad take-out food, and any other activity you’re normally strictly rationed on.

Hell, my wife took the kids out of town for half of Saturday and most of Sunday a couple weeks ago and I spent the entire time playing video games, eating Chinese for dinner AND lunch, and watching shit like Blade the Series on TV. My friends could have called and said “Dude, we’re having a party at a strip club tonight with Tommy F-ing Lee!” and I would have been hard pressed to give up the free time even for that.

When you’re married with kids, you cherish every minute of precious alone time, with or without strippers.

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May I just say: Awwwwwwh! That is the sweetest thing, ever. You should tell your wife. I bet she also says “Awwwwwwwwh!”.

I hear Tommy Lee really knows how to have a good time.

No, it means you’re a control freak.