Wisdom and Aphorisms from President Trump: Great Leader, Great Teacher, Great Supreme Commander, Great Helmsman of our Nation


#19979

As one of my friends used to say, he could fuck up a wet dream.

Think it is time to resurrect this video -you’re in?


#19980

A million dollars says this trip wasn’t planned. Why? Because he was supposed to be in Florida golfing at this time and that got scrapped cause he had to pretend to work to try and make Democrats look bad after he soiled himself. Then for the last week there’s been increasing focus on how he couldn’t be bothered to visit troops not just this year but last year as well, but he’s such a moron he’s actually thought he had the troops in his back pocket this whole time. Reading that 60% of troops disapprove of him was probably a massive shock. I’d expect troops will be getting another bribery raise soon.


#19981

Dave Barry doesn’t even have to try any more, just write down everything Trump did.


#19982

The way he described it. Sneaking around in the dark, I think. No lights on in the plane, pitch black. Sure it’s massive hyperbole, but he can’t help but do that. Yeah, I think it was last minute. He probably made a big deal about how he had to visit the troops.


#19983

In any other administration I would give the benefit of the doubt that this “surprise” trip to Iraq had been planned for weeks, and it was simply coincidence that all the talk of Trump not visiting the troops happened to precede it over the past few days.

But this is Trumplandia. jpinard is spot on when he says Trump most likely planned to spend Christmas through New Years golfing and partying at Mar-A-Lago, and that this Iraq thing was likely thrown together at the last possible minute by his staff as a way to address both the “Trump ignores the troops!” headlines AND the loss of faith incurred with the resignation of Gen. Mattis, especially the latter.

Mattis is “the man” in military circles, he is literally one of the most revered and respected U.S. military men since WWII, and for damn good reason. When it became clear that Trump had lost Mattis, the unspoken understanding was that the military went with him. A big part of Trump’s appeal to his base is his supposed support for and by the military. If it starts to get around that he’s unpopular with the military, it will erode his support with what is left of his base. Therefore…Super Sekrit Iraq Trip To Hobnob With The Troops!

It’s transparent as all get out, and now appears to have been a giant flop as well since it looks like his idiotic use of social media may have exposed the identities of a Seal Team. Commander In Chump.


#19984

#19985

Holy shit, Dave Barry is still around?

Time to party like it’s 1995!


#19986

I haven’t seen this quote posted about Donnie’s trip to see the troops.

Absolutely. When I heard what ya had to go through. I mean look, I had concerns for the institution of the presidency, because, not for myself personally, I had concerns for the first lady, I will tell you

He will tell us this, but like everything that comes out of his mouth it’s a total lie. I especially like that he finally had concerns about the institution of the presidency, you know, the thing he shits on daily.


#19987

Yeah, I thought he had probably retired. Comedians and comic writers just don’t stay funny long-term.


#19988

The lesser Josh Marshall marked up that part of the transcript haha


#19989

#19990


#19991

Oh yea, and that jacket looks like it’s made of the same nylon trash bags that Bethesda sent to people paying $200 for canvas Fallout duffel bags.


#19992

In case of a water landing the President of the United States acts as a flotation device.


#19993

It reminds me of those dumb right-wing art pieces that depict him like a circus strong-man.


#19994

The whole thing is a fun read. At least I enjoyed it. Apparently Trump even thanked the press!


#19995

Colonel: Well Mr. President, you look like a small…

Shithead: I want an extra large.

Colonel: Um, sir, that might look…

Shithead: Extra large!

Colonel: But…

Shithead: Do you like being a Colonel?

Colonel: Extra large it is.


#19996

This might be the fakiest fake news of all! He is awfully slim though - at least a pound under whatever weight would put him in the Obese category!


#19997

To be fair he was looking at his hands.


#19998