Any coffee dorks?

Irish coffee: Larry Niven’s favorite drink. I got my recipe out of N-space, I think.

Yeah, and use this whiskey. Heaven.

I drink my Irish Coffee like Churchill drank his martinis. I look in the direction of the coffeepot, then I pour a glass of whisky and drink it.

See, @stusser. “Just drink straight whiskey, neat” is the ULTIMATE ultimate why fuck around escalation.

Next comes butt chugging straight-up Everclear.

And then crushing oxycontin into powder and snorting them.

Black tar, obviously.

And I think we’ll probably end on smoking crack rock in aluminum foil in a condemned building ripped off a stripper you murdered with her own stiletto heels.

Damnit… how did you know my weekend plans!!!

GET OUT OF MY HEAD!

And now you are wearing them as you smoke the crack, blood still on them.

yes…

Furiously masturbating and subsequently collapsing into a seizure and swallowing your tongue, choking to death covered in blood, vomit, and jism. Then your sphincter relaxes as the spark of life leaves your body and poop is added to that mélange.

All because one spoon of French vanilla haagen daaz wasn’t enough for your coffee. You had to chase that dragon. Now look at you. Pathetic!

This thread bump started out promisingly but went downhill fast.

You’re just mad because nobody suggested putting spiders in their coffee. :)

Apparently it’s catching on.

Blurred for the spider-phobic.

Worst Coffee Bug story.

On the back porch drinking french press one day.

It’s in AZ on a Mandean Sky Island (topographically speaking) at the beginning of the rainy season, so the Hummingbirds and insects and life in general were out in force (pollen, growth).

Reach hand blindly for cup on table to my right, take a sip and…

Drink a bee.

Bee stings tongue.

Hi-jinks ensue.

I’m obviously doing this ‘coffee’ thing all wrong.

At the new Tokyo Starbucks ‘Roastery’

customers who visit the Roastery will be able to order elaborate drinks like black tea lattes garnished with turmeric cotton candy

Whoever made that decision must be a tea drinker. The idea that coffee is less essential to life than sugar is indicative of why civilization is going to the dogs.

But they’re good dogs, Brant!

Am I weird for preferring cheap brandless vacuum packed ground coffee over expensive fancy beans? I like it best when the machine needs cleaning badly too. I just like it filthy, sour and oily I guess.