Most loathed/shitty game patching system?

  1. LOTRO (1000s of tiny files followed by more 100s/1000s of files followed by…you get it)
  2. Marvel Heroes (1000s of tiny files)
  3. Games For Windows Live games (sometimes signing into GWL layer in-game prevented quitting of game to patch)
  4. Windows MS Store download/patching progress system for UWP games (can’t change number of downloads, canceling/pause/progress broken as fuck)

Any others out there that waste our time and/or just badly-implemented?

LoL had a horrible launcher for years, but its better now. It used to stop at 99% and sit forever.


Hey it runs the games so it sorta counts!

  1. Chrome - updates secretly, breaks stuff that doesn’t’ get fixed for months, if at all
  2. Discord - Updates all the time, no change log, can’t tell if our members that take forever to start-up are having problems with an update or not… somehow we get on different builds.
  3. Android …
  4. ProFantasy - doesn’t seem to update in the app, gotta go get it like it’s the 90s.

I’m sure there are more.

Thanks for the reminder. Man, Electron apps’ update systems suck.

This. I want DCS-OS for my machine. I’ll just boot into another os for the other shit.

I included it there in #4!

Oh yeah,

  1. AMD - freaking mouse cursor bugs that kept coming back

Marvel Heroes really was horrible. With an update client updating itself in the worst way before trying to update whatever it was updating and… eew. I think EVE must have been their inspiration (although I think it changed a few years ago).

Chrome is horrible for the precise reason Nesrie described. One of such highlights I remember was when Netflix stopped working properly for a month.

Company of Heroes retail!

What did it have, 40 huge patches that you needed to install in sequence??

SWTOR by far, followed by anything on Origin.

SWTOR will only let you update the client if you are signed in, which means the client can’t background update. So, even if I get the urge to try it out again a few times a year, there’s a huge patch to install which means I’ll be unable to play until a point in the future when I’m not really interested anymore. Argh.

Yeah, what the hell are they updating anyway? It’s like 4x a week…

But is it worse than when we had to update everything manually? Find out there’s a patch (if they were good, you’d be emailed about it, otherwise you’d find out through a newsgroup if you were lucky), try and find the download page, download and unzip it, find the install location, sit there for 20 minutes watching small boxes fill in, pray that it worked. I even remember getting sent a game update on a 3.5" floppy disk in the Amiga days.

I recall the Neverwinter Nights 2 patcher being something of a nightmare.

The Standing Stone (LOTRO, DDO) patchers are bad in that they have a bunch (4+) of sequential updates to 1000s of files at a time.

Copying/updating individual files takes far longer than a single large file. Each time, just as you think you are done, there’s a couple thousand more:

By that token should we all shut-up because we don’t get to read a manual while waiting for large patch to download on a modem… no, no, of course not.

We all know what good patching looks like today, and today these don’t make the cut.

If you find out before I do, please share.

To add to this, I’m tired of the shit cutesy patch notes that started with quirky indie iOS devs.

“We made this with our love and fixed some shit.”

That they won’t detail.

I miss those days! :) But hey, at least I didn’t mention having to type the patch in. Had to do that a couple of times, altering values in memory using a system command on an old 8-bit computer, then saving the resulting file over the original. But I thought that might date me a bit too much.

I miss GameSpy, FileFront, GamersHell and FilePlanet for all that cheap file hosting during the dotcom rush. They all collapsed after the money disappeared well before patching went to online-only.

DOOM WAD patching was the first differential patching wasn’t it? Usually whole files were overwritten or replaced.