Things you should never, under any circumstances, ingest but are technically food


UK bakery chain Greggs has a novel take on transubstantiation:



What the hell …

I mean, I’d try that out, but that is pretty crazy.


So would I. Except for the creamed corn and the green bean casserole.


I need to replicate some of these flavors into popcorn toppings.


Oh. Offal. I think ive posted about some of these individually or in a previous offal conversation upthread but ill summarise the lot again for your delight.

Fergus Henderson is one of Britains greatest chefs, so this is an ode to his nose to tail philosophy.

Top down

Brains - lambs, on toast. Or this. The brain burger.

poached then crumbed and fried, served with finely sliced white cabbage and a caper-studded sauce gribiche if you go to St John.

Cheeks, ok not offal but beef cheeks are the best meat for a casserole you will ever have. Absolutely fabulous after a good few hours slow cooking with red wine. Pig cheeks I did i cider in a similar way. Fish cheeks are great too, Skate “knobs” are lovely and a cheap way to eat.

Working our way down, let’s not go to far, because the thymus gland is handily renamed Sweetbreads, and rather delicious. I’ve even cooked these at home but are a bit fiddly to prepare.

but these are the ones I had at Marcus Wareing.

they had a sweet, sticky Asian style glaze on them.

Hearts… duck hearts and chicken hearts on a skewer and grilled or a robata are heavenly, or big, very rare slices of ox heart mixed with rare beef from Tongue n Cheek at Kerb

Lungs- found in stuff, can’t ever recall seeing them as a dish.

Liver - calf liver is a luxury and treated like steak. Chicken livers I do Southern Fried. Pig and cow liver with bacon, or in things. It can be a bit grim if overcooked.

Here’s a pigeon liver, heart, and something very pink ive forgotten accompanying a pigeon main course at The Ledbury

Kidneys - in beef casseroles and pies is an easy win. Or one of my favourite dishes, devilled kidneys on toast. but can also be lightly grilled and almost raw from smaller animals.

Stomach - Tripe. With bacon, peas and onions at St John is best. Although really nice in a pho. There’s a dying British tradition of boiled tripe eaten with vinegar (perhaps 1 or 2 stalls in the North left now), and thats where its got its bad rep from.

Intenstines are… an acquired taste, but Ive been adventurous enough to try andouillette a few times. I first ate one when my parents accidentally ordered it on holiday in France and i finished the plate no one else could eat.

The French connoisseurs describe the best andouilette as “really shitty”

Lower still? Really?

Yup. Eggs aren’t just from birds. We’ve all eaten big salmon roes on Sushi right? Or caviar? Or cods roes battered and fried? but has anyone had milt? Its really nice on toast.

Whats milt I hear you ask? Well its the opposite of eggs from a female fish, from the male fish. Do i need to spell it out or are your retching?

There are other bits, eyes, ears, lips, dicks, vaginas, nipples, anuses, bladders etc Ive not tried… whole but we’ve all eaten them a million times because thats what hotdogs and processed meats are made from. They are usually blasted off the carcass with a high pressure water jet.

Videos 2017 - YouTube and Beyond

While I would not eat some of those things, I have had others that were delicious. For instance, I have had sweetbreads and I can’t deal with the texture. OTOH I’ve had intestines, grilled at the table, at a Korean BBQ that I loved.


Milt shouldn’t be any grosser than roe, but it kind of is. I don’t know if that’s just the patriarchy talking though. As you mention, it’s supposedly quite good, fishermen (of certain fish) seem to enjoy it immensely.

There’s an old David Quammen essay where he asks a chicken farmer “Have you ever thought about why we eat chicken eggs, but not chicken sperm?”

The farmer replies “Nope.”

“Uh…yeah. Neither have I.” He lies in response.


Arby’s is buying Buffalo Wild Wings for $2.4 billion.


I’m already getting the meat sweats.


I’m kind of surprised Arby’s is doing well enough to be buying other restaurant chains…


I’m just waiting for Arby’s to launch a last-last-gen-styled MMO called World of Meatcraft in the vein of Chex Quest TBH


Vegetarian griefers;

“Hold the line!”


Love isn’t always on time. Oh, oh, oh.


Arby’s buying BWW? How the hell?

Just purely anecdotal, but I’ve eaten at BWW more in the last year, and I’ve spent 1/4 of that year traveling in areas lacking and really only eat out on exceedingly rare occasions, than I have at Arby’s in the last decade plus. Like I could probably expand the timeframe to 15 years and be true.

This makes no damned sense.


I originally read this as “Arby’s buying BMW” and my brain was just like, “Whatever, it’s 2017. Just fuck everything. Why not.”


Maybe Demolition Man just got the restaurant name wrong.


Maybe they bought BWW so they can change over their restaurants into being that instead of Arby’s?


Saw this for sale over on Amazon, has anyone tried it?

It is just their mediocre summer sausage, but 100% beef, in a 3ft log form.


checks his memes for proper response

“Yard-O-beef!” gachiGASM