Wisdom and Aphorisms from President Trump: Great Leader, Great Teacher, Great Supreme Commander, Great Helmsman of our Nation


Okay, Brian is moving on.


I think it’s time for a group hug here.



Thehas’ great strength & patience was given to him by Zeus.


The slowest but surest poison creeps through his body, unbeknownst to his closest confidants and friends. Cell after cell is ravaged by free radicals (might they even be Muslim free radicals?). The name for this pernicious, highly secret poison? The Power of Life, Itself.


Yeah, a toddler smearing feces on the wall.


I can’t find that statement online, but here’s the corresponding tweet. The “us” in “Theushas” is supposed to be a US flag emoji. I don’t think I’ve seen Trump attempt to use emojis before this.


Edit: Might be worth asking wumpus to support emojis in embeds.

Suggestions for future improvements to our forum software

That account’s bot works by scraping his tweets immediately and then presenting them in the format seen upthread. “Funny” and prevents ninja deletes. Maybe it doesn’t work with emojis, doesn’t change the fact he’s a moron.


It sounds like Frank N. Furter from The Rocky Horror Show.


For years one way North Korea has been keeping their populace in line is with propaganda that the United States wants to exterminate them.

Trump has given them SO MANY QUOTES now that they hardly need to add any propaganda spin to it anymore. And the other half the time he’s boasting about how many new weapons he’s making.



Yeah, that’s… a bizarre way to parse the history of World War II.

All respect to the French Resistance but they didn’t storm the beaches at Normandy. As for Poland… well, Poland got fucked all over.


So is “NoKo” a goddamn thing now? Because, well, fuck.


The true question for the #UnitedNations today, for people all over the #world who hope for better lives for themselves and their children, is a basic one: Are we still patriots? Do we #love our #nations enough to protect their sovereignty and to take ownership of their futures?
Do we revere them enough to defend their #interests, #preserve their #cultures, and ensure a #peaceful world for their citizens?
Our #success depends on a coalition of strong and #independent nations that embrace their #sovereignty to #promote #security, #prosperity, and #peace for themselves and for the world.

We do not expect diverse #countries to share the same #cultures, #traditions, or even systems of #government to respect the interests of their own people and the rights of every other sovereign nation.
We must work together and confront those who threaten us with chaos, turmoil and #terror.
#USAatUNGA #UnitedNations #UNGA #USA 🇺🇸


I was just hanging out on Instagram, thinking, “Self, what should I do? Should I think about #cultures, or #patriots? I wonder what’s going on with my #interests. I wonder if any of my leaders are strong enough to #preserve them.”

Actually I wasn’t, because I am a human fucking being and not an SEO bot. But hey, I understand that Trump voters have to have something to look down upon and not fucking kill themselves. Or not. Either way.


I see “unga” and immediately think of Captain Caveman.


Say what you will about Trump, at least he is man enough to apologize for forcing Turkish thugs to punch American protestors.


No wonder New Yorkers hate him.


Battle of Liars draws in more Experts



So that’s how you look when you’ve sold your soul.