I remember this one time on the podcast when Christien expressed regret over saying “x movie is y movie for stupid people.” I can’t remember the movies but I was touched by his thoughtfulness about such a seemingly innocuous statement.
First, my genuine and deepest condolences to Christien’s family and friends. He was simply one of the best people I’ve ever known. Smart, funny, loving, gregarious, accepting, generous, kind - I could exhaust a thesaurus trying to describe him and still fall short. I think part of why his passing hits so many so deeply is that Christien’s friendship was so whole-hearted that he gave a bit of himself to everyone he knew. That bit of him we all carry now pointedly reminds us how great the loss of him is. But I don’t think any of us would trade having known him in exchange for removing that pain.
I first met Christien when I started attending Shoot Club around maybe 1999? I had learned about Shoot Club through a posting Tom made on Usenet, to give you an idea of the era. I became a regular attendee right away, but after meeting a bunch of new people that first night, the only names I remembered at first were Tom and Christien. Well, I think I remembered “Dingus” first and later learned his real name :) He was absolutely part of the unofficial welcoming committee, and you didn’t have to chat with him long to see that he was a very active listener. Even with perfect strangers, there wasn’t any idle, immediately-forgotten chat, he showed a genuine desire to get to know you. Whether Yeats or Hallmark said it, he was the embodiment of “There are no strangers here, only friends you haven’t met.”
I’m angry at myself for falling so far out of touch that I didn’t even know Christien was ill until I learned this morning that he had passed. I can make all kinds of excuses - I took a new job several years ago that’s time consuming; my wife has been struggling with several chronic illnesses; the kids have been growing up; etc. - but they’re just excuses to cover my own regret. So I’ll take this as one final life lesson Christien taught me: make time for your friends, you won’t regret it.
The last memory I have of Christien was one of the last times I went to Shoot Club, maybe six years ago? My attendance had been becoming less frequent, but it still was always fun when I went. After an hour or two of the usual talking, catching up, cracking wise, snacks, kibbitzing on games (and sometimes actually playing them!), I had said something that made him laugh. Christien looked at me with a big smile and said with genuine sincerity, “Man, I love it when you’re here.” Christien, I loved it when you were there, too. I’m a better person from having known you. The world won’t be the same without you.
I’m not nearly the movie fan he was, but I’ll close with one of my favorite movie quotes, of course:
“See you on the other side, Ray.”
im absolutely devastated by this news. my heart goes out to you guys and everyone close to Christien, especially his son. sorry im hastily typing through tears. I never wrote in but you all have had a real impact on my life. Love all of you.
Thanks man, that one had me tearing up.
I will be taking that one with me. Tell people I enjoy that I enjoy them. That’s such a good yet easily overlooked thing.
I can’t think of anything that doesn’t sound trite. I feel fortunate to have hung out with Christien the few times that I did. He was a kind and warm person, and I loved hearing about his shared movie experiences with his son. He meant so much to those of us who knew him only peripherally, that I can’t imagine what those closest to him are feeling right now.
Tom, Fire, Kiernan and Christien’s family, I am so sorry for your loss.
The QT3 movie podcast was my first podcast, and it remains the only podcast I consistently follow. Christien is a big part of why, providing a balance of analysis, humanity and humour that came across the internet clearly, despite me never meeting him. He will be missed.
This is a tragedy. My condolences to Christien’s family and friends. I never had the chance to meet him, but listening to him on the podcast really made it clear how caring and genuine a person he was.
I’m very sorry to read this. My deepest condolences to his loved ones.
I am very very saddened by this news. I lost my father suddenly last year. It is painful to be constantly reminded of someone you have lost every time you engage in an interest you shared with that person. Now I think of those things as an homage to my father and dwell on the happy memories of us together.
My thoughts are with Christien’s friends and family in this painful time.
Such sad news. R.I.P.
I am so, so sorry to hear this. I know it’s a parasocial thing, but I am heartbroken over his passing. My deepest, heartfelt condolences to Tom, Kelly, Alexandra, and Christien’s family and friends.
This is horrible news. My condolences to his family and friends. He’ll be missed.
Christien Murawski spoke brilliantly on the Quarter to Three podcast all decade. He spoke with abounding kindness and abounding passion. I never spoke up that Christien Murawski was important. I related to everything he said and felt about films and the world. It is not right in the world that he passed away. I offer my sincerest condolences to Christien Murawski’s friends and close ones.
Thanks, Christien Murawski, for everything you brought to the Quarter to Three movie podcasts. You helped me think about and enjoy movies more.
Just now finding out. Sorry to read about this.
I have not seen many of these names since before the great forum sundering and it’s a little heartening to see those names return to attest to how brilliant Christien was on movies and more importantly, as a kind soul.
God damn it.
I’m sure Dingus would rather we joke and make merry, but right now, I can’t. This is so unfair.
Love to his family, especially his son. It was undeniable Christien thought the sun rose and set on him.
Tom, my condolences to you, his family, Kelly, and the QT3 family as well.
I know I’m late coming to this, but it’s still such a shock to me. As everyone has said far better than I could, Christien was an exceptional person. His earnestness, kindness, and patience meant that, even though he was rarely the host on the movie podcast with whom I agreed the most, I was still desperate to hear his opinion. Even with the embarrassment of riches that is ten-plus years of him on the podcast, it’s such a blow that we won’t have any more of his light and laughter. My heart goes out to all the friends and family that he’s left behind.
My favorite memory of talking with Christien, through the limited venue of emails and the forums, was being able to respond to his concern about whether his son was old enough to see Jurassic Park with my own experience as an eight-year-old who was impossibly excited to see a blockbuster about dinosaurs. The way that Christien took in and considered what other people had to say was, to me, the highest form of love and respect that strangers can show on this awful place called the internet and, if I have it in me once I’m done mourning this, I’ll try to be a little more Dingus in how I treat others.
Rest in peace.
I know we’ve been short on details, partly because we were hoping Christien would recover and come back to tell you about it himself. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen. But I know Christien would have wanted to share with everyone. If you’ve listened to the podcast or met him, you know how generous he is with his private life, which is why so many of us feel so close to him. He had a way of bringing you in, unreservedly. So I don’t think he’d mind me telling you what happened.
About six months ago, Christien was told his liver was failing and that he would need a transplant at some point. Sucky news, to be sure, but worse things could happen. I even offered him one of my livers, at which point he gave me an amused look and said, “That’s kidneys. You only have one liver.”
I’m positive the only reason he knew this so readily was because he’d been talking to doctors recently. Livers, kidneys, who can keep them straight?
So he was dealing with a failing liver when he contracted what would have been a difficult infection even in someone with a healthy immune system. Unfortunately, it spread quickly as he waited the few days for an upcoming doctor’s appointment. By the time he was supposed to go in for his appointment, the infection had spread dramatically, and it was clear he needed to go to the ER. From there, we were told he had contracted sepsis and needed immediately to go into the ICU to get a new liver as soon as possible. His liver and kidney’s had been effectively shut down by the infection.
Over the course of the next two weeks, give or take – time passed so strangely for all of us – he underwent several operations to remove the infection, because he couldn’t get a transplant until it was safe to shut down his immune system so his body wouldn’t reject a new liver. Bodies don’t know what to make of new organs being stuck in them, so they freak out and attack it with immune systems. So part of what’s precarious about a transplant is that the patient’s immune system has to be shut down. But Christien’s immune system couldn’t be shut down until the infection was gone and his body had stabilized. Removing the infection required several surgeries and, unfortunately but necessarily, a lot of trauma to his body. Ultimately, it was too much in his weakened state, and after a certain point, there was nothing the doctors could do.
During his time in the hospital, he was often on a ventilator and/or unconscious. At times, we could interact with him, and those moments did everyone’s heart good. He would talk to us through eyebrow gestures or writing on a whiteboard or using sign language with his son and ex-wife, who have studied ASL. We read him messages from this thread. On a few precious occasions, he was able to actually talk with us. His family turned out in droves and there was almost literally never a time that a loved one wasn’t in the room with him. I mean, occasionally, everyone got kicked out so he could get a sponge bath or something. But even overnight, someone was in his hospital room with him.
When he finally died, we were all given notice that it was time to come to the hospital and say good-bye. We held his hand, we kissed his forehead, we cried and said good-bye as his heart rate and blood pressure slowly faded. He was in no pain. The last thing he had experienced was an afternoon hanging out with his son.
We’re all still grieving and it’s meant a lot to us what people have been saying in this thread. It’s meant a lot to us to know how many lives he’s touched in such a heartfelt way. It means a lot to read here how Christien did so much good in this world. Thank you all for your posts.
-Tom