Yeah. Today marks the 31st day since it shipped, so it looks like I'm SOL for returning it to Amazon. I will need to RMA it to Zotac. Who knows how long that will take? And since it's an intermittent problem, the repair tech is likely to run the card for all of two minutes, decide it's fine and ship it back. Just like MS did with my original Xbox 360.
The Founder's Edition cards had a fan problem that was fixed with a bios update embedded in a driver update. I'm hoping that that's the issue (and solution) here. But, probably not. I'm also hoping for a 3rd-party fan replacement solution, but that's not looking good either.
Some dude in this thread managed to zip-tie some ugly-ass fans to his 1080, but, hey, beats going back to the GTX 970 (and 1080p) for a month.